


Yearning

by omiomus



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, POV Ushijima Wakatoshi, i think???, this can be romantic or platonic its up to you, what are tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:20:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28182297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/omiomus/pseuds/omiomus
Summary: Ushijima knew better than anyone that yearning for someone, someone as fiery, as passionate, as blazing as Oikawa would be a hopeless endeavour....Finally, Ushijima thought.Finally we’re standing on the same stage again.
Relationships: Oikawa Tooru/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Kudos: 30





	Yearning

Ushijima knew better than anyone that yearning for someone, someone as fiery, as passionate, as blazing as Oikawa would be a hopeless endeavour. He knew that Oikawa had hated his guts since they were still children, but they had been children then. He hadn’t known the impact his words would have, the way his words stung without him meaning it to. Back then, he had been a child looking at Oikawa for a strong ally, looking but not knowing how to quell the hatred that burned fiercely in his eyes. He didn’t really understand  _ why  _ Oikawa threw his hatred at him so easily, had tried so hard to understand but never really getting an answer. 

When Ushijima thought it over, years after their last game in high school, it was only then that he’d realized. He hadn’t been just looking for someone to play great volleyball with. He yearned the bond that Oikawa and his ace had. He saw it clearly from the start: two young boys who’d been by each other’s side no matter what, playing like true allies. Ushijima had done his best, in the way he knew how, to persuade Oikawa to become his setter instead, to dedicate that talent and skill and hard work to make Ushijima’s team reach a higher peak. He was naive, inexperienced in the world of emotions and words, hadn’t understood what switching to his side meant to Oikawa’s pride and fervent promise to Iwaizumi that they would defeat Ushijima one day. He’d just been a child, though he was somewhat mature physically, his emotional intelligence was years behind, a product of his fervent dedication to play volleyball. Growing up around normal children in normal schools, he was neither liked nor disliked, either because people could never seem to figure out what went on in his mind or that Ushijima simply didn’t put the time and effort into building relationships with people who didn’t play volleyball. It wasn’t that he didn’t  _ want _ friends, it was just simply how life went for him, what with all his time constantly being consumed by volleyball. He’d always been like that, neither shy nor reserved, neither friendly nor unfriendly, neither social nor antisocial. He was simply… blunt? Unafraid to voice his thoughts and opinions, but never with the intention to offend or insult. Most people shied away from that because most people were afraid of confrontation—though Ushijima never really  _ means _ to confront. Ushijima knew that he often had difficulty reading in between the lines, picking up on the connotations of other people's words as well as his own words. He had never particular paid attention to it, as he never really needed to, at least not with volleyball. During his high school years, during the time that the eccentric Tendou had persistently befriended him, to which he found rather strange and then amusing later on. 

Meeting Tendou had been like a wakeup call. He started to understand, though quite slowly, that words can turn into weapons, weapons which he had unknowingly used on people he yearned for. To the people who took the time to get to know him, ie. Tendou (and his high school teammates to some extent), his straightforwardness was amusing more often than not because his extremely earnest way of approaching and responding to situations were just… often unusual. Ushijima always says what he genuinely thinks and sometimes that is difficult but sometimes that is his strongest trait. Once you befriend Ushijima, it becomes extremely, ridiculously easy to trust him, easy to see that there is something more to him than just being a volleyball powerhouse. Ushijima had always been headstrong, always sure of himself, never doubted his own efforts because he  _ knew _ himself best. And that is his downfall. 

He only really knew himself. Himself and a number of friends that he could count in his one hand. It had been years since high school, seemed like so long ago too, but he hadn’t gotten that much better at expressing himself in the way that a charming social butterfly would. It wasn’t a pressing issue, given that Tendou still blew up his phone with rapid texts at random times of the month, so he didn’t think he was doing terribly. However, now, facing Oikawa again in the court for the first time since their last high school game, he feels his mouth dry up like a measly puddle of water in the Saharan desert. 

He schools his expression, remaining unbothered, looking like he hadn’t just been rattled by the sudden revelation that he’d forgotten what it was like to face his childhood rival, what it was like to look at the feral sneer on Oikawa’s face, what it was like to be captivated by the fiery passion of Oikawa Tooru who stood on the opposite side playing for a country that was not his own. He did not think about the sudden feeling of immense elation nor of the fact that he had been smiling back at him just as ferociously. Oikawa Tooru had finally done some good on that promise he declared years ago, when he was still brazen enough to have snot dripping from his nose in public. 

_ \- Finally _ , Ushijima thought.  _ Finally we’re standing on the same stage again. _

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I find ushijima so endearing ,, I think his cluelessness at times can be rlly charming ! love that for him


End file.
